1. Forgiveness. I fully and 110% learned how to forgive someone this summer, definitely not through myself but with a whole lot of prayer, quiet times, advice, and a lot more prayer. I always thought this was an easier process when there would be a message about it. But, until I really had to forgive people, I didn't realize how hard it really is. I was called home this summer for this one purpose - to forgive. I guess you could say I'm the type of person that holds on to things until I can't hold grasp of it anymore. I would give it up to God, and then two days later I would take it right back, with ten times more of a mess that seemed to grow with it in those two days. After 6 months this got to be a big 'ole mess. It was something bigger than I was, and I didn't know how to handle it. Througout the summer God has placed different events, occasions, bible studies, quiet times, and people in my daily life to help with this process. I'm not saying I'm done with this process, because I don't believe I am, but I am stepping out of this summer with a bigger understanding that it is possible to forgive those who do you wrong. I never in my wildest imagination would have thought I'd have a crying heart for these people, but looking at their life now - my heart is broken for them. Like I blogged about before, I wanted the last laugh. I wanted the victory through it all. What a wrong and crappy way of thinking about other people? Through this forgiveness I now have the desire to pray for people who have done me wrong and that their lives could be restored and their storms to be over, too. However, I am so glad this little chapter of my life is finally coming to an end.
2. Sometimes the opportunity isn't the calling. This summer I had lots of opportunities to serve God in awesome places all over the world, and at times I wished I had taken those opportunities and put them to some pretty good use, the most important thing wasn't there though - the calling. I'm not saying I didn't have a calling, because I did. My calling was to come home. Weirrrrd. When I prayed about it during early spring semester I was kinda confused when I didn't feel the calling to serve all summer, because if you had asked me this time last year, "A big majority of your friends are going to be doing summer missions next summer, do you think you will?" I would have said yes without hesitating. I would have loved that. But, that wasn't God's plan for me. By March I just KNEW why I was supposed to come home. And while that reason played a huge role of my summer, it wasn't everything. I now realize that my heart was d.e.m.o.l.i.s.h.e.d. God has used what seemed like everything over the past year to break and rip my heart nearly to shreads, but the amazing thing is - he restored it into something better than before. Looking back, I didn't have the heart to serve people all summer (as selfish as it may sound). Instead, God placed people in my life to show me awesome little signs of hope here and there.
3. I am blessed + super blessed + totally blessed + a whole lot more blessed. Working this summer has made me put on my big girl panties and realize that I am blessed. Something I forget a little too often. I am blessed to have parents who love me. And I mean genuinely love me. A couple of weeks ago my eyes were opened to this. There was this precious little three year old girl that came through my line with her mom. About halfway through checking them out, the little girl starts asking her mom questions, "Mommy, who's alcohol is that? Are you going to drink that?" She was three. I'm pretty sure I didn't have a clue to what alcohol was whenever I was that age. Her mom grew very irritated with her and told her to shut up. I was absolutely floored. I don't understand why anyone would want to treat their children like that. My eyes were opened to more situations like this over the next weeks. Growing up, I never understood why my parents wanted to know what I was doing, who I was going with, and why they wouldn't let me go some places. Now, I realize its because they cared. They cared that I was okay, behaving, and not making stupid decisions.
4. Be nice to your cashier. haha. I didn't have many problems at all with this except for the mean grouchy old women. However, I'm going to throw this out there for all cashiers. If you get a shopping cart, take it with you from the register when you leave. Biggest pet peeve ever: when people leave their carts while your in the process of checking out 4 people in line. Also, don't complain when we ask if you want to donate something to a local school. Simply answer "no thanks" and go on with your business. thank you. :)
All in all, I've had a pretty good summer, but as you can tell - I'm so very ready to get back into the swing of school life. With all of my friends from ETSU! And actually, having a regular schedule of school and fun. This past weekend I went to Murfreesboro to spend the weekend with my two of my bffae's - Hannah and Anna. It was good to get caught up with these two and hear more about their summers. We also have a new roommate - and I am thrilled that it worked out that Chelsea Leonard could live with us. However, please be in prayer than we remain friends throughout the year. haha (as I'm 100% sure we will)! 4 best friends living together could have the potential be like The Real Housewives of ETSU on some occasions. :)
